10/18/08

God's Plan

Dear Diary,
I'm sorry I haven't written in a while. It's been a hard few months, especially emotionally. The last time I wrote to you was when the angel Gabriel visited me and told me I was pregnant with God's son. I know this is a great blessing and honor, but lately it seems to be more of a curse.

A few weeks after Gabriel came to me I told my parents about the whole thing, but they didn't believe me. That was three months ago. My stomach is starting to show more and more each day. Everywhere I go I'm no longer met with a smiling face. Those have now be replaced with a judgemental glance. The ones who used to call me friend won't even look at me. My reputation has been ruined. I used to be remembered as the one with a loving heart, a sweet smile, and someone with a servant's attitude, but not anymore. I'm not thought of as the family embarrassment.

Right now I'm at a loss. I don't even know if Joseph will still marry me. The last time I saw him I could barley look into his eyes. When I finally managed to, all I saw was anger, shame and disappointment. I pray Yahweh he does not divorce me. I don't know if I can bare all of that. If he divorces me I'll be stoned, or worse, I'll go on living a life of isolation because my family will disown me.

I had always hoped God would use me to do something great, but being deemed as an adulator is not what I had in mind. I'm sure this will be worth is the moment I hold this baby growing inside of me in my arms. Until then though, I pray I can simply make it through another day.
Sincerely Yours,
Mary.

1 comment:

Tropical Summer said...

Amazing! That is so awesome what you are doing!!!!!