A Struggle

Beauty has always been a struggle for me. I grew up hearing, "Your ugly", "Your fat", "You don't dress right". Those words came from peers, classmates, and even my best friend. The stung too-it cut like a knife right through my heart. However, I was able to put all of this behind me, at least for a while. Once middle school hit I lost the weight. But as the pounds were lost, so was my self-esteem. My contentment was found in what others thought of my body verses what my creator thought of it. I got to the point where I was constantly looking in the mirror to check to make sure my hair laying just right, or my makeup was ok. I was so dissatisfied in how I looked. It ate my up inside, but I never told anyone, that was until I met Ms. Luke. I ended up meeting here at a retreat, and we talked for hours as I spilt everything. Through her lectures and our conversations I became to know and believe that I was truly was a Daughter of the King. Psalm 45:11 says: The king is enthralled by your beauty;honor him, for he is your lord. My Daddy King loved me for me, in fact He was enthralled by my beauty. The King, Creator and maker of the Universe was enthralled by how beautiful I was. Imagine that. The one who created the world is ENTHRALLED by how beautiful your are. Pimples, freckles, bad hair days, He loves you and thinks you are beautiful. On days when Satan trys to come creeping into my thoughts with reminds of old peers words, I simply say "The King is Enthralled by your beauty, honor Him, for He is your Lord." I don't have to constantly look at myself, I don't spend hours getting ready each morning, I don't have to strive to meet the approval of my peers. I'm not bound anymore. It's been a slow process and some of the wounds are still healing, but I know that I am a Princess, and Daughter of the King. I can be confident in who I am.